Something I have neglected to mention on here, is that just about the same time I started pissing about with Hard Drive RMA requests [...]]]> Over the past few weeks I’ve not been having much luck, as far as computers go. I got my RMA’d hard drive, after waiting about 2 months to send the old one off.

Something I have neglected to mention on here, is that just about the same time I started pissing about with Hard Drive RMA requests and such, my machine started crashing, and generally running like shit. This is nothing new really, so I just installed new a new anti-virus app, some other anti-malware shit, and thought nothing of it.

Then it started  doing it specifically when I was doing something graphics intensive. Okay – I’m running an old card, but it’s normally alright for basic games. Anyway, out with the card – the fan has seized up and baked… to the point where the clear plastic has gone brown and cracked.

Fair enough, I retract the invitation for FIARRRR to visit my PC, and stick the only other GPU fan I have on it and not play any games until a replacement arrives. On goes the fan off an ancient GeForce 2 (after some persuading with a pair of pliers and some wire sheathing)… still fucked. Sod it, I’ll use my laptop (craptop).

Now we play the waiting game. 5 weeks… no fans have arrived – I complain, get a refund. 7 weeks… holy shit – they DID post them! In goes the new fan. Still slow as shit, but not crashing as much. I need to install Windows 7 anyway, so it all works out alright.

Speaking of Windows 7 – I’ve been running it on my laptop for a while now, it seems alright.

It seemed alright UNTIL MY FUCKING LAPTOP CHARGER DECIDED TO BLOW UP. The second charger I have had for that laptop is sadly no more. I now have no laptop, a slow as shit desktop, a server with no hard drive, and 2 other desktops that are hardly worth powering up.

I suppose in a way that sometimes things that are a bit of a burden can work out fairly well. For a while, I’ve had ChadWinkle’s laptop sat in the spare room, waiting for a new screen (and hasn’t been powering up for weeks). Reseated RAM and wifi card, and it works again. Thank fuck for that. External monitor… top banana. So that’s where we are today, computer wise. Until I get some jewgold next week, and buy a new machine.

Then there is my router.

For years, I’ve had absolutely no trouble from my router. Since I switched to PlusNet back in 2005, I’ve had 8 IP addresses… pretty good for assigning each machine a separate IP, and of course the VPN, VOiP phone, and other such devices I invented to justify having 8 static IPs. The router has had no problem mapping these IP addresses to local addresses using the web GUI.

Another thing my router is good for is Wireless range. That means I can get onto my network from anywhere in the house and garden. It also means every other fucker around here can see my SSID. If everyone can see it, why not make it something funny? Bwhahahaha.

Well, anyway… the other day I changed it a few times, and settled for ‘BITCHES DONT KNOW BOUT MY WIFI‘. Next morning I go to do something or other on the spare room PC, and the SSID has changed back to the default one. I hadn’t seen the default SSID since I set the fucking thing up in 2005, so this was a bit of a shock. Suppose I’d better secure up my network… hey, I might as well update the firmware too, right?

Wrong. Mistake number 1.

Well, right if you want to plug in your router, stick in your password, and go. The new firmware is essentially that of a fucking BT Home Hub. If you want to do anything else, keep the original firmware. No problem, it can’t have changed that much, and I still have a backup of the old config… I’ll load that up, and we’ll be back on track, right?

Wrong. Mistake number 2.

The router will now not boot, won’t reset factory settings, and I have no internet to find out how the fuck I am going to fix this mess. Luckily for me, there are plenty of Home Hubs around here, and people who own Home Hubs, although they don’t know it, are very generous with their bandwidth.

If anyone reading this has fucked the config on their Speedtouch router, and can’t get into  it to reset the factory settings – do this:

• Turn off the device
• Plug the ethernet cable you’re using into port 1 on the router
• Hold down the reset button on the back of the router with a pen or paperclip
• Power the router up whilst still holding the reset button – hold it down for 15 seconds
• Run the firmware update program within 1 minute (it will try to boot normally after this)

This should allow you to restore everything to factory settings.

Thank fuck for that. At least now I have some sort of interwebs access without having to ‘borrow’ someone else’s, but it still doesn’t solve my original problem. I’ve read the entire manual – it doesn’t look that difficult.

Until this happens… with no sodding explanation:

Thanks Thomson. I love it when you change stuff for no apparent reason to make things difficult.

After a fair bit of pissing about… in telnet… I’ve managed to get my IPs mapped. Again, for anyone who’s stumbled across this on the googles,  here is how you do it:

• Open a telnet client (upto and including XP, start > run > telnet
• Assuming this is the IP for your router – the command

• o 10.0.0.138

• The default username and password are ‘admin’ ‘password’. Funny that.
• Command (assuming 123.123.123.123 is the IP allocated by your ISP, and 10.0.0.50 is your local IP):

• nat mapadd intf=Internet type=NAT outise_addr=123.123.123.123 inside_addr=10.0.0.50

• That should have done the trick – you can check what you’ve just done by typing the command

• nat maplist

Maybe I should invest in a new router. And stop writing very long, very dull articles.